Something about Hips don't lie

Hmm, Hips don't lie eh? Sounds pretty good, I might check it out.

Okay, a fairly standard start, furries running away from a guy with horns, nothing I havn't dealt with before. A little bit of an innapropriate comment from Wyclef Jean there. "We got the refugees up in here". As if being a refugee is a culture to be proud of or some bullshit. That's exactly like saying "WE GOTS DA PRISONERS OF WAR UP IN HEYAH". Then little john begins rapping as sluts in skimpy prisoner garbs start dancing behind him, moving their hips from side to side, side to si-Sorry, on with the post.

Okay, this isn't helping, plus this drool can't be good for my keyboard. So it's the standard fare of Shakira being a whore and then we have that usual "runnning through a room ful of fabric that someone put up". Except this one is far more terrifying.

(Do you want some candy little bonita?)

Let's all get over the fact that Wyclef Jean looks like the bastard son of that one guy from black eyed peas and a tapir and get on with the post. So we go through a few more seconds of that scene and then we see the most horrifying sight known to man.

No, not Wyclef. Check out the back.

(There's a what behind me?)

The fuck is that!? Is that what Shakiras hips do to you? Turn you into a creepy mummy? Or did some poor cast member just say to the producer "Hey frank, look, I know your going for sexy here, but I just got this burn victim kid for half price down at the orphanage, and you know how I can't pass up a good deal, so can he be in the video? I know you already have Wyclef for the creepy aspect, but what if you want to really disconcert the audience?"

Then the fat producer gets up off his chair smoking a big cuban cigar and says "John, your a genius, get this man a big juicy paycheck!"

And the rest as they say, is history. Creepy as fuck history.

Finally, no more-

(Bastard child of a storm trooper and that girl from the ring)

"Again, John?"

"2 for 1 sale Frank, I'm not made of stone!"

(I didn't know they made Burqa's in Harley Quinn Colours)

So the rest of the clip is boring as fuck. Wyclef is possessed by Betty Boop at one point and says "Hoob boop pa woop" at one point and then says something about a musical transaction.

Shakira: Good

Wyclef and Creepy Kids: Bad

Result: Unpalatable.